Every time the bleeding slows or stops, I breathe a sigh of relief. Every time, I feel a blanket of security embrace me as I naively tell myself "It's over. It's all going to be ok." I have set my self up for devastation numerous times now.

I can't help but feel heartbreak every time I feel me and Hercules taking steps backwards. This time, the bleeding started early in the morning. I was sleeping when I could tell that it had started. It's frustrating to know that even resting can trigger the bleed. It makes me feel helpless and a out of sorts. If moving causes it and resting can trigger it as well, at what point will this nightmare be over?