Womping Willows, Magic Sticks, and Skunk Colonies

It was another glorious day at Fort Huachuca. Bright and early, yawning at the crack of dawn. It was so glorious. The sun didn't even come up until two hours of us being outside. Most of my platoon had to do a ruck. However, I'm on profile recovery for my hips and knees. I tried to get on the ruck to join in the fun. However, that was a no go. "Sgt. Can I please ruck?" "No. Absolutely not." "So tomorrow I'm rucking huh?" "No. You will not be rucking." "Alright. So I should pack my ruck and be ready to go." "You will not, I repeat, will not be rucking." "Fine."

So instead, in true Foxtrot Company fashion, I was the Detail Queen. The detail crew left earlier than the rest of the platoon. We were going to be water support for a competition called the GATBY or something like that. Basically, GATBY participants have to complete all of these competitions, swimming, running, shooting, and a ruck march. A minimum of 15 miles and a minimum of 40 pound ruck. Two girls from my platoon were competing... and let's just say they were basically amazing. They ran the whole thing.

Anyways... my job was to be dropped off on the side of the road at 0430 hours. And then wait for them to run by so I could offer them my water. Me and my friend Duque just stood there. Waiting. It was 34 degrees. The smell of fresh skunk was in the wair. We just kept walking in circles, trying to stay warm and praying we would not have to run in case a skunk decided to show it's face. Finally, we constructed a help/sos sign and abandoned our post to explore our area. (see pictures)

This didn't bring any aid. However, 2 hours later our platoon came running... and they kept running. They didn't even want our water. I felt so hurt. I had stood there waiting for them to come, and then they just wave and keep running. Without my water. That was our only job. Was to just wait. and wait so we could give them water... and we failed. We failed miserably.

We got back to our bay at about 10. And crashed. It's hard offering people water who won't take it... like they say. you can lead a horse to water but you can't make the horse drink it.

I love you guys. It's been a while since I've posted because life at Fort Huachuca has started to pick up. Every day we have class, and then usually we're not released until 7 or 8 pm. It ain't cute. But only 40 days left in glorious Fort Huachuca... and then I'm home sweet home.

<3 Jacki

Elephant Butt

Hello there from glorious Fort Huachuca. One of my platoon sergeants, SFC Hall, said that he was noticing a lack of motivation within the platoon today. Quite honestly, it's hard to keep the motivation up day to day when it feels like the cadre go out of their way to mess with us... as if they are spending all their time concocting plans to suck all the fun out of here. That is, if there indeed was fun to suck. So, his solution was to give a motivational speech that went something along these lines...

There was once a village full of blind people. No, not flying people, blind people. One day, they realized that there was an obstruction in the road that lead to and from the village. The obstruction was a ginormous elephant. They decided to send their three wisest people to figure out how to move this elephant that had plopped down on their road.

When they reached the elephant, they decided that the elephant was reality. By figuring out more about the elephant and how to move it, they would figure out reality. Moving the elephant would open them to the world.

So the first blind wise man grabbed the front of the elephant, the trunk, and said "Reality is like a tree. Standing tall and firm."

The second blind wise man pushed on it's side and determined, "Reality is like a wall. Tall, firm, and unwavering."

The third blind wise man reached from behind, putting his hand up the elephants "butt," and said "Reality smells like shit and now my hand does too."

Basically, SFC Hall said that we needed to learn that TRADOC is the butt of the elephant. Once we get out of glorious Fort Huachuca, we'll move onto the better part of the military or elephant or reality. For now, we have to gain a sense of humor to make it through. Knowing that in two months, some other poor soldiers will be standing there listening to the same motivational speech because they too are stuck in the butt of the elephant is kind of comforting...

A sense of humor will be what makes the days pass and what makes them tolerable, regardless of whether I'm here or in Iraq. I may just have to be reminded of that every once in a while. For now, I really can't think of anything funny about being on fire guard from 1 to 3. I'm thinking really hard, but nothing is coming. I think I need some practice...

Happy Birthday Aubrey!

Hello there beautiful baby! Yesterday you turned two! Your getting so big! Your even starting to grow some hair! I was really sad that she had to miss your birthday, it looked like you guys had a lot of fun... even though you told me you didn't have any of your elmo cake. You even learned the hokey pokey! Now you can do that dance and your happy feet dance! Next year Auntie will hopefully be there for your birthday, and we'll do something really special. And I will be home soon so we can go and do really fun things like we used to. I think about you every day, and my locker is plastered with pictures of you. Everyone says your the most beautiful little girl, and Auntie would have to agree. Keep being good for mom, dad, and grandma. Give them lots of hugs from me, ok pretty girl? I love you soooooooooooo much!


(if you want to see pictures from aubrey's birthday party, my mom posted them on flickr. check out http://www.flickr.com/photos/35088002@N08/page2/)

"Barrack Maintenance"

Hello there from glorious Fort Huachuca. I would like to officially say, HISCO here I come. Also, I have conquered the beast that is IPT. I don't remember my exact scores, but I passed with flying colors. That's all that really matters when it comes to IPT. However, 11 of the kids in my class alone didn't make it... they'll have there second chance tomorrow.

I don't know how many total from the platoon didn't pass it, but with 6 classes and my class is the lead class... I'd have to say it's around 50 to 60. That's a pretty hefty number. Half of that number will probably pass the second time around. Take the 20 our platoon lost from medical, and we'll have about 130 left from the 200 we started with.

Today and tomorrow are respite days as the group that didn't pass IPT do corrective retrain to try and get a quick cram session before they head back into the booth tomorrow. This means barracks maintenance... now personally, I'm inclined to believe that my bed needs a little maintenance. Looking at the girls sleeping to my left and right, I have all the evidence I need.

I'm blessed that my best battles down here survived with me. They really have become my second family. Now that IPT is done, and we have 59 days left down here, I'm starting to think I might start to miss these nerds. They can often be found in their bay playing risk or conducting operations against the other bays using their nerf guns they acquired from walmart the one night I wasn't with them... clearly a mistake on my part. But they are always good for a game of put put or singing in the car. And they make the time go by quicker... which is key when your stuck at glorious Fort Huachuca

I miss you guys and love you, as always!

<3 Jacki.

We're Jewish

Hello there from glorious Fort Huachuca. It's 2319 my time... and that means it's 0119 your time. a tricky concept indeed. I just thought I would let you guys know that I had a flashback to grade school tonight... when I used to fight with Josh constantly but I was fiercely protective of him. I remember the last day of school before Christmas break this kid just wouldn't leave him alone. He was badgering him with no mercy. As me and Josh went to get off the bus, this kid sneared a Merry Christmas at us. And Josh, showing his Crotteau side, said "We're Jewish asshole." We just walked off the bus laughing.

Tonight was kind of like that. This kid I went to school with, who eventually dropped out, is officially an authority on the military after being in for 4 months. He has the audacity to critize Josh on his military baring on my facebook, a social taboo under any circumstances. On a joke that was between me and Josh. Something to the effect of "josh you piss me off, get your shit together by next drills." and upon me coming to his defense, he said "hey...you try drilling with him! haha even sgt binsfield said he cant possibly be related to you."

This kid, who has been in the military for a minute, thinks he is the judge on all things military. I sent him a message letting him know that it's a poor show of military baring to act like he did. The message proceeded into how Josh won't be able to cut it if he continues to act like a, god forbid i say it, teenager. My apologies that my brother made the sacrifice to join the military younger than most and that maybe he doesn't have the experience of a highschool dropout.

Anyways... the point is that this boy sent Josh a message, concerned about the welfare of Josh as a soldier in the US military. I loved Josh's response... I'm going to post a portion of it. Because it's the same thing that I've had to go through..

"...And about your little comments on my sisters wall, thanks, I really appreciated when sgt. binsfeld said "he cant possibly be related to you." Because even though my sister and dad have made a trail for me, I'm choosing to make my own path, grow my own charachter. And thats what motivates me to work hard..."

We make it based on our own character and morales, not based on a brother or father. They can help you get in, but from there you are on your own. Supply was my dad's way, intel is mine, and computers is Josh's little niche in the military. I'm insulted that Josh has to be upheld to the standard of someone else. He doesn't need to meet my standard, he'll exceed his own.

<3 Jacki

No Daylight Savings!?!?!

Hello from glorious Fort Huachuca. It has a been such a nice weekend... hell week is officially over and we could finally just relax. Every night of hell week I was out late studying. On any other circumstances, I would have avoided studying until the last second. That is, if I studied at all. However, this was a little bit more serious than just a high school test. IPT determined whether or not I was stuck here longer, something I just can't afford to let happen.

I feel like overall I did pretty well on IPT. We won't know if we passed or not until Monday, and I'll be sure to let you guys know the outcome. However, this whole weekend most of my class has talked so much about it that they have convinced themselves they have failed... and they all have plans to go to Mexico if that's the outcome. I might join them, I could use a nice tan so I can get rid of the wonderful tan line that has formed from my beret. It looks just lovely.

TRADOC does not look so kindly on soldier hopping the border... so we'll have to be stealth about it. If however, no Mexico is necessary because everyone passed, we will all start the next phase. The next phase is called something like HISCO or something along those lines... Human Intelligence Source Collection Operation. I think that's what it is... and that changes a lot of things. I will not have to carry my backpack. We don't carry backpacks because we move onto top secret stuff, and we can't carry any of the material home with us. I am horribly distraught over not lugging my backpack around. I feel like I will get over it very very quickly. But because we change the classification of the course, I won't be able to talk about what I am doing. Some of it, but not a big chunk of it. Also, we won't be confined to a booth or a classroom, we'll be walking around the base in groups on two or three to collect information. I here Burger King is a hotspot for collection... along with the bay... which just happens to house a lot of beds... apparently TRADOC doesn't look so kindly on soldier who happen to collect intel in the bay either.

Ok. This is completely unrealated... but did you know that Arizona doesn't abide by daylight savings? I had no idea. I was so confused last night. I couldn't tell if my phone had automatically reset, and then I realized I would now be 2 hours behind all of you guys when this whole time I had been 1 hour. My whole life I've loved when we set back an hour and dreaded when we have to move forward an hour. I feel like I've lost a small piece of myself... but I also haven't lost sleep. I feel like you should have warned me Mom and Harry... you lived here and you knew all along. You never prepared me for this...

<3 Jacki.

Put Put Champion of the World

First off, happy birthday to my mom. I think today is the first time I can remember not being home for her birthday. My family, in particular my mom, have truly become my best friends over the years. Mom your one of my closest friends and you are the first person I want to call when I find something out. I will never call you because I have dry hands or other weird reasons like a certain sister of mine has done though... but I do know that you are my biggest source of strength some days. I'm sorry that I couldn't talk to you longer than just a little bit this morning. But know that all day you were on my mind, even as I was frantically studying. I love you, momma.

Second off... hello there from glorious Fort Huachuca where it hasn't been so glorious. This week is basically hell week for 35M students. We are in our final days before IPT, Interrogation Performance Test. In essence, it's a horrible combination of the SAT, ACT, and the most important interview for the job you always wanted. It's nerve wracking and this week we have a couple of days to really practice what we need to work on before Friday.

On Friday, we will be on lock down as three different groups head into the booth. First booth, that's me, heads up to the school houst at about 6:15 AM. Until noon that day, we will not be able to talk to anyone but the detainee we are interrogating and we will silently write our reports. Then my group is released back to the company where we will sit silently, not discussing the iteration. The second group will head in at about 8:15 AM. And the third will head in at about 11:15.

Usually we find out the results of the iteration as soon as we have completed the interrogation, however lucky for us they will hold the scores until Monday so that we can freak out until that morning. However, as my sergreant put it... he will know and he can laugh as he pictures us freaking out... he's a friendly guy I tell ya...

Friday determines wether we continue on in the course. If we fail, we have one chance to redeem ourselves before we are recycled or have to start from square one.... all the way back to death by powerpoint. Something I wouldn't wish on anyone... however at least 5 people from each class (6 classes of 30 students each) is expected to not make it. That's 30 people gone just like that. This weekend will be spent preparing for the next iteration in case we failed... so we are on lock down again. But they might let us off for saturday night and sunday.

So, in preperation of a long and boring week of studying late into the wee hours of the night, I went put putting with a few people from my class. I am sad to report that while I talked the talk, even going as far as to say I was the put put champion of the world... I did not walk the walk. And I have suffered from it every single day. But it was nice to get away for a little bit from glorious Fort Huachuca.

I love you guys, and I'm sorry that I've been so busy this last week. Next week, hopefully I'll be able to write and tell you I passed and worried for nothing.

<3 me.